Revelations

Having Asperger’s makes it hard for me to understand what people are thinking, why people react to situations the way the do, and how other people connect with their friends and family.

I have always loved watching TV and movies. Even when I was little I would stay inside and watch the same show over and over again. I soon found that watching the characters in the experiences. I always found it hard to relate to the world around me. I found it challenging to follow and remember all of the lives and information about the people close to me.

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“Did I Miss Something?”

Recently I read a post from blogger Anonymously Autistic which was about what Autism actually feels like and how others perceive it. In the post she talks about how being called “high functioning” is not always a good thing, and how being labeled this makes people think she is more capable of things than she really is.

This post summed up everything I have ever felt in my daily life. Since my diagnosis only happened recently the people in my life are now seeing the underlying reasons for my actions. They now see how much it upsets me when plans change, that I cannot eat certain foods because of the textures, and why all I want to do is stay in my room and play video games.

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Expectations vs. Reality

I have noticed that when people see me they see a “normal” human who is a fine member of society, and therefore assume that I will act as such. But this is not always the case. I often find myself in situations where people do not understand why I am acting a certain way, or people not understanding why I cannot accomplish a task that all “normal” people should be able to accomplish.

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My World and the Real World

Over the course of my 20 years as a person with Aspergers I have discovered that I do not see the world as others do. There are two different ways in which simplicity comes into play in my everyday world.

The first is the way I walk into situations. I see them in their simplest forms. If I see two people fighting with each other I think to myself, “If they dislike each other that much they should stop being friends.” It is sort of like being a five year old in an adults body. Seeing the world this way means that I do not stress about some of the things other 20 year olds do. They worry about what they eat all the time. They eat food they do not like just to be healthy, but they complain the entire time. When I see this I think to myself, “if you hate the food you’re eating, don’t eat it”.  They see eating healthy as having an impact on their lives in the long run. I do not see the long term effects, I see them being unhappy in the moment.

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